if only i could be so grossly incandescent

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277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
eggscommunicate
weaver-z

I love Clark Kent because realistically both a nice 6'5 superhero with godlike powers AND a friendly 6'5 country boy reporter would be rolling in bitches, but Clark suffers from terminal Sweetiepie Syndrome and has zero game as a result

weaver-z

image

Fighting for his LIFE on the phone with a cute girl. He's so real for this.

weaver-z

I'm happy to see that the notes are still divided into people who are roasting him for the use of "hey-o" and people who are being very open about their carnal desire for this man.

idrils
tiktoksthataregood-ish

beet-8e-3t-42

Transcript (thank you to @witchstone for sending me the missed and/or unknown words/places)


Hello! I'm back to show you how to make one fashion blunder after another starting with these pyjama pants. Which are so big each can be used as a sleeping bag. And then, from the children's department, I got this tiny little vest. Please have a look at my pecs, I went to the gym today. Look how tight that one is.


Okay, too tight around my big pecs. I then went and got this vest that came from Dolly magazine 1970's Christmas Edition. Fix my hair, clap clap for that.


Nope, I'm not going out in pyjamas anymore. I decided I would just put on these plain ordinary jeans. Doodgewone jeans for any occasion and just have a look at that. That's not too bad. And then bring out the slippers, because I'm still quite keen on the nightwear thing.


And then check if I can dance, yes I can as long as I don't move my feet. And back to 1970s where I got this jacket from the old man down the road. He said I could use it, but I said no not today, I don't wanna wear it out too soon. Found a little bag from the girl down the road again and now look at me!


I look like the gay plumber from Pofadder.

acanvasofabillionsuns

[Video description: A tiktok by eiitanbroude, captioned, "my mum does my voice over lol." A fairly skinny man, shirtless with black pants on, is reflected in a floor-length mirror. He holds up a large pair of shiny, pale pink pants and puts them on. They're pretty oversized, the bottoms pooling at his feel and seeming to barely stay on his hips. He then holds up and puts on a white undershirt, which is a bit too small. He feels his pecs and then takes the undershirt off, replacing it with a cream sweater vest.

He runs his hands through his hair, claps them together twice thoughtfully, and then takes off pink pants and replaces them with a pair of jeans. He holds up a pair of slipper-like shoes and slides them on, then does a little standing-in-place dance.

he then puts on a dark brown jacket (that looks like it has some lighter splotches on it, as if tie-dyed), smiles at the mirror, and takes it back off. he holds up a small, teal bag with a long strap and puts it on cross body. he poses for a moment and then turns and walks away. /end ID]

little-robin-h00d
headspace-hotel

wolves in eastern USA are a really bizarre case actually because. okay, so, we have coyotes right? they're everywhere. And supposedly wolves haven't been in the eastern USA for a long time.

however. I'm on inaturalist and gray wolves have presence in many areas across the globe, whereas coyotes are restricted to North America. And iNaturalist maps largely corroborate this

However. if you just pull up coyote observations you'll see a huge variety of animals with a great range of sizes and appearances. Which is like, okay, wolves are still way bigger, the people ID-ing the photos must know what they're talking about

HOWEVER. look at observations of gray wolves, specifically in Eurasia, (where there is no overlap with coyotes) and you'll see animals that make you think. That's a Coyote. The size and shape is fully indistinguishable from the coyotes you were just looking at. BUT IT CAN'T BE A COYOTE. 'CAUSE IT'S IN POLAND.

So basically what's happening is that all photos taken in an area of the USA where wolf presence isn't officially documented are confidently identified "coyote" no matter what even if they can't actually be distinguished by a low quality photo

headspace-hotel

Looking up how to distinguish coyotes and wolves makes my brain dissolve entirely, because in Connecticut (example) there are numerous trail cam photos of BIG coyote- or wolf- like creatures with rounded, blocky muzzles, stout bodies, short, rounded ears, walking with their tails held horizontally, all definitively identified as coyotes, so it's like...is there some diagnostic trait I don't know about or is everyone just assigning taxa to an indistinct animal based on what they're "most likely" to be

headspace-hotel

What do you mean red wolves are 45-80 pounds

...

I'm trying to read about the relationships between canid species in North America and I've completely lost the plot.

So Wikipedia cites this study as evidence that red wolves are distinct from coyotes, which basically...examined their external morphological characteristics? and determined that...red wolves are more similar to red wolves than coyotes and their hybrids and they have distinct morphological traits? Is it me or is that circular?

Meanwhile the coyote page cites this study which seems far more rigorous in that it actually analyzed the animals' genetics, and this found that red wolves and coyotes form a clade separate from gray wolves, and that all the wolves, coyotes included, are monophyletic. It also found that all North American wolves contain coyote DNA, and that red wolves are around 60% coyote, whereas Eastern timber wolves and Great Lakes wolves are around 40% and 25% coyote respectively (though they are considered to be in the gray wolf clade). See also this study, which largely agrees with the idea that red wolves and coyotes are closely related and that there is a ton of hybridization, meaning essentially all North American wolves and all coyotes have some of the other's DNA. A quote from the second study linked:

An exhaustive search of wolf genomes from the Great Lakes region including Algonquin Provincial Park, where pure eastern wolves are thought to exist, and from red wolves from the captive breeding colony reveals little unique ancestry and instead demonstrates a distinct geographic pattern of admixture between gray wolves and coyotes. We argue strongly for a less typologically oriented implementation of the ESA that allows interim protection of hybrids while encouraging the restoration of historic patterns of variation through habitat protection.

This earlier study treats Eastern Wolves as conspecific with Red Wolves and identifies "Coywolves" as a genetically distinct population with wolf and coyote ancestry. It also notes that North American canids "do not conform to the species concept" because they are not reproductively isolated from each other. Here's a quote:

Coyote/Wolf hybrids are likely harboring Wolf genes that would otherwise be lost due to genetic drift in a small isolated population ... and hybridization is moving towards a Canis that is better adapted to anthropogenically modified landscapes.

This is my first time diving into actual studies about this subject, and I'm just kinda stunned because the evidence appears to very clearly show that wolves and coyotes are basically the same thing existing on a spectrum of phenotypes.

This is just utterly at odds with the policies surrounding the species, where wolves are treated as this noble, essential keystone species firmly protected by law whereas Coyotes are vermin to be slaughtered by the thousands.

People are allowed to kill Coyotes with reckless abandon in the same territories where Red Wolves dwelt. This means that people are almost certainly slaughtering Red Wolves or at least slaughtering what remains of their DNA, because no one knows how or to what extent the two are different.

The second study I linked discusses how the division of the species has implications for the animals being covered under the Endangered Species Act or not. Basically, we had to separate the Eastern Wolf for Gray Wolves to retain protections, because if they were the same species, that would be considered a valid reason to kill 'em all. And obviously, the Red Wolves would not be protected if they were considered the same species as coyotes.

It's almost like the most versatile and adaptable of the wolf phenotypes was offered as a sacrifice to sate the bloodthirst of the pro-wolf-killing faction, Coyotes separated from the rest so the other wolves could be protected and thus live.

But coyotes contain a ton of genetic diversity that could help the other wolves survive. One of the studies above mentions that the 14 founding red wolves of the current population have very low inbreeding coefficients despite being the last of a dying breed. It's because the coyotes have served as a reservoir of diversity.

The divides are a political fiction, they're a complicated family of species that together contain the diversity that holds the key to survival.